VIDEO: THAT WASN'T ME, THAT WAS MY ANESTHESIA SELF – THEY HAVE DIFFERENT AGENDAS!
Anesthesia is a wonderful invention that takes the pain of surgery away completely. While laughing hysterically in the recovery room isn't exactly appropriate, anesthesia can have effects that could be pretty hard not to laugh at. People are known to say ridiculous, nonsensical things that would make them cringe the next day. These are some of the funniest things people have said when waking up from anesthesia:
1. “Doctor here. You may know that we ask the patient to count down from 10 while we put him under? Well, he woke up murmuring ‘-53, -54, -55…’ as if he’d been counting in his sleep.”
2. “I had an operation to remove a cyst from my ovary, but there was a good chance I would lose one or both of my ovaries. I had no recollection of this, but the nurses told my mom I asked, ‘Do I still have my lady balls?’
“…I did indeed get to keep my lady balls!”
3. “When I came out from having my wisdom teeth pulled I apparently shot up, looked at the doctor and said, ‘Charlatan! I demand you return my teeth! They are mine and I will choose where they are to be spent!’ My dad said he couldn’t stop laughing because I wouldn’t leave without them. When I woke up at home I asked my dad why my teeth were in a plastic bag on the table, he told me everything and promptly started calling me Lord Molar for the rest of the night.”
4. I was in bed hospital room, waiting for surgery, they already gave me meds to calm me BUT they knocked me out.
Two nurses come in to move me to a gurney' but they were small and I'm big so they can't move me over.
My wife came over and poked me in the ribs saying you're snoring rollover, and I rolled right onto the gurney."
5. "When I got my wisdom teeth out, they strapped my arm down for the IV anesthetic.
Apparently, before passing out, I looked up at the white haired German Dentist and said in my best Connery,
"Goldfinger, do you expect me to talk?".
The dentist didn't reply, but he did tell me after surgery that it was one of the funniest things anyone asked him in a "haze."
Got any funny ones of your own? Let us have them in the comments below.